Hello, chaps and chappettes. Time for a year ending thingamapost to placehold my wordpress account before they kick me off for lolligagging. Truth be told––and those of you who know me already know this––I’ve been attacked by many projects at once. Those of you who really know me also know that I tend to check out from the world when embroiled in a number of creative adventures, and I’ve come to find that includes online worlds, as well. Sure, I supply my share of comments in this forum or that blog but when it comes to concentrating on reportage of the more personal variety, I tend to leave it go. The idea overwhelms me a bit, and I’m sure you’ll see why very soon.

Novels –– I’ve completed what really feels like a polished edit for sWitch. I’ve queried it around, gotten some positive feedback and some garden-variety rejections. Next up: get it to print so I can send it around in its complete form (I think of it as an art piece of sorts, so it has to be framed) and create a website for it. I’m thinking of using social networks to create a naughty buzz. I feel I’ve written something the likes of which you’re not likely to find at your local bookstore, and I’ve decided to make that an asset rather than an obstacle. You don’t get the chance to review your own work in a query, and to be honest it’s not really my style. Still, I’d like to take this opportunity to say that sWitch is challenging, smart, fun, scary and not afraid to push all of your dirty buttons. Who knows, if it becomes cultishly popular in the next year, maybe I’ll work up an illustrated coffee table version that will offend and delight your guests in equal measure. Or perhaps I’ll edit a trailer for the outrageous film it’s begging to be. My ultimate dream is for people to throw “sWitch Parties” where everyone dresses like a suburban square save a few sexy, paganistic touches and dances to lounge music while eating pentagram cookies. Can you dig it, man? Anyway, also coming soon is Square One –– a science fiction novel about the rediscovery of humankind by our own cybernetic creations centering on the most unlikely love story of all time against an all-too-familiar sounding rebellion. Notes are being taken with the first chapter not far off in the horizon.

Screenplays –– I’m still querying Shelf Life and am considering a few fledgling filmmakers to send it to. I’ve given some thought to making this one, as well. Since becoming pretty handy with my relatively new Canon XH A1s digital video camera, the idea to shoot something for a festival has greatly appealed. I write like a filmmaker, so why not take the next step? Ditto for Welcome to Cydonia, which needs making in a bad way. Cape May is still waiting, and you don’t keep an old girl like that waiting for long.

Other writing projects –– my animated vignette The Ballade of Haunted Hill will hopefully be completed sometime early in the new year thanks to the extraordinary efforts of my wonderfully talented collaborateur and sometime tea lady Teodora Parvanova (Soon to be Teodora Jones, which is probably the coolest name since Cleopatra Jones). She and I are also working on an animated TV series that we’ll be entering into a European animation contest. The story is based on an old Bulgarian Fable of sorts about an incorrigible young boy who finds his heart after losing his head in hell and it’s pretty rad in an Alice in Wonderland kind of way. And if you’re wondering, yes, finally getting my big break with an animated TV series after collaborating with a Bulgarian animator I met over the Internet by answering her “ad” for a writer is exactly how I envisioned my career path to go. All kidding aside, Teddy’s a delightful gem with a bright future and it’s been educational and fun to work with her. Whatever comes of our projects, I’m already proud as punch to have created what we have and hope to continue our partnership long into the future.

Music –– because there’s still a little time left between working, eating and sleeping, in addition to gigging and embarking on various projects with my band Surrounded By Idiots I’ve been putting my solo acoustic act together and am available for hire come the new year. It’s been an embarrassing amount of fun to get serious about––not only writing new songs and finding my identity as an acoustic artist––but honing my guitar skills. Most of my weekend is taken up playing and rehearsing and if you’re interested in learning more, head to my website and check out my artist list (which is constantly growing).

TV/Web Productions –– for the past few months I’ve been developing a cooking/reality show called “Table 42 with Chef Darryl Harmon” that takes place at The Water Works Restaurant in Philadelphia. Chef creates special dishes for a lucky couple who have been selected to dine at the famous “Table 42″ where over 300 wedding proposals have taken place as well as all sorts of other special moments. For more info on that, check out the website and look us up on Facebook. Shooting is scheduled to begin next month and we’re hoping to host a premier party at The Water Works for Valentine’s Day. Forks and fingers crossed we’re able to pull it off. So watch all spaces and keep an eye on your HDTV sets, as the table is set for us to be there, too.

And that, folks, is all the time I can afford to give you. It doesn’t mean I don’t love you, it just means you’re a few pegs down the list. Hey, at least you’re on the list, you ungrateful, time-stealing, bas–just keeding. Allow me to leave you with one of the most beautiful folk guitar performances I have ever seen and a song I hope to include in my repertoire. Ladies and gentlemen, Jesse Winchester singing Sham-A-Ling-Dong-Ding on Elvis Costello’s excellent Sundance Channel series “Spectacle“.

I agree, Neko. Have the best damn holiday ever, everyone. Peace to you all.

Huge THANKS go out to Heidi Martinuzzi, blog vixen extraordinaire behind the horror site Pretty Scary, for featuring me as Scary Stud of the Month for August. She’s hot and hilarious in equal measure, so if you have a few minutes, go check out her site and give her props. She prefers the bloody and frightening variety, but you may just want to keep them at the accolade level.

In other news, CAA rejected my query for Shelf Life without looking at it because they can’t legally do that sort of thing. Which means I need an agent to get an agent. Seriously, writing the screenplay and/or book is by far the easiest part of this business. Speaking of, I’ve sort of changed my mind about Square One and The Cull. I now see them as two books in a series of three. More on that later.

Thanks again, Heidi. Oh, and I hope my “fame” is extended a few days into September or you’ll be hearing from my agent. When I get one.

…THE CULL! It’s the sci-fi thriller with horror elements that involves a draconian plan to maintain the population of an overcrowded biodome city and how that affects a group of young friends during a night on the town. If you’ve been following, you’ll see I’ve made some small changes to the idea. For one, I’ve added “with horror elements” because it does have them and I want those readers of horror added to the list. The other change is from “depopulate” to “maintain the population”. The former suggests some form of genocide, which is well off the mark. The latter refers to a more dystopian worldview that is driven by need, which allows for that all important moral rub.

So why has The Cull won out? Well, for starters it’s a book that I have a very clear idea about, so it may be more ready than the others. It’s also more widely marketable with crossover genre appeal and a young “cast”. The concept also deals with some hot-button issues such as immigration, class distinction, climate change and even abortion––albeit devoid of any tiresome religious context. In the various characters’ journeys there are plots that involve disenfranchisement and a sense of hopelessness that I think will extend to a younger demographic, but told within a framework that appeals to an older, possibly more sophisticated audience, as well. In short, I think an agent will know how to sell it.

The reason I had been holding off on starting it was because I did see the story as perfect for a screenplay, and projects for the screen favor my chances of representation. But I decided that the budget was too high, which left me at least as far out in the cold as I am anyway.  Therefore, it stood to reason that I should choose the medium that can best tell the story in the way I want to tell it. So, having just completed a screenplay I’m proud of and presently querying, a return to prose seemed a healthy change of pace. Not that I haven’t been writing my short stories, but it’s been a while since I’ve completed sWitch (which is still working its way around the dark, query universe) and I wanted to get back to novels before I forgot how to write them.

That’s all the news for now. Stick around for progress and excerpts and feel free to contact me with any questions you may have about writing and the process of starting a writing career. I may still be climbing the hill, but I bet I can show you a few rocks and branches not to grab and maybe a few that will hold.

And now, you’re perspective video of the week and what I like to call “Full Contact Free Speech”.

Now I’m tasked with choosing between two new book ideas as sWitch remains out on query. One, titled The Cull, is a sci-fi thriller that involves a draconian plan to depopulate a gravely overcrowded biodome city and how that affects a group of young friends during a night out on the town. Yes, I want the entire, full-length novel to take place in one evening. I’ve not seen it done very often, so the challenge appeals.

The other, titled Square One, involves a race of robots in the extreme future who discover the DNA of man. It sparks a great deal of political and spiritual controversy as many in this society don’t believe man to ever have existed, let alone be responsible for their creation. When humans are bred into this world, they cause quite a stir and introduce some harmful as well as beautiful elements into what is a very efficient and peaceful, if slightly cool and drab society. Think Jurassic Park meets Planet of the Apes meets Asminov on a bender.

I’ve other ideas that I’m just not ready to begin yet as they require more extensive research––a historical novel set in bohemian Paris at the turn of the 20th Century called The Unveiling and something of a modern take on gangster life (set in the world of NYC fashion) called Ganster Lean. More to come on those soon. For now, let’s have a laugh at The Wiggles. Sometimes, when life’s got you down, you just have to point your finger and sing about fruit salad.

Welcome to another “episode entry” that seeks to disturb (and distract) you with various thoughts and images all related to that wonderful box of brain-eating radiation we commonly refer to as the TV. So get up real close, because it’s so funny when mom orders us to sit back or we’ll go blind. That’s not why I’m going blind, mom!

What’s On:

Click to get your own. Only $19.99!!1!

As most of you in the know already…um…know, Battlestar Galactica has once again docked its gritty form of spacey paranoid theater inside our airlocks. My thing is to let a few episodes pass me by so that I can load up for an evening of one, long uninterrupted chunk of geeky goodness. And people, pay attention: it’s still awesome…mostly. I won’t spoil here, although I’m sure I’m well within my rights to do so, but to summarize quickly: they found earth, it sucked, they had a rebellion, it failed, the Cylons are learning some mind-blowing shit, and I’m like “whuh?”.

Let’s put it this way, the first episode that dealt with the aftermath of the coup was a ten-thousand word sack of expository revelation delivered at 100 miles-per-hour. And even after I went to the official site to catch up, I realized why the show is so good and why it’s also losing me a bit; it’s so fucking deeeeep. There are family trees here that are so thick and complicatedly branched that halfway through climbing around in it you realize you never put this much work into your own freakin’ tree. Not that it’s all that interesting to learn that your great Aunt Edna from Bulgaria lived until she was 98 because she never left the house. Compared to a race of humanoids constructing a race of robots to enslave only to have them construct robots to eventually free them (or something, I’m close), it’s just not all that worth the eye strain.

Anyway, it’s still good, unrelenting and merciless drama in a very cool setting. Yes, it’s a little confusing at times, but so is arithmetic and you still have to balance your checkbook, right? And if anyone out there is watching it, let me know how you’re finding the final season of this groundbreaking show.

American Idol. Oh, shut up. I have something of a vested interest, okay? I was once given the opportunity to try out for Star Search when I was in high school and turned it down to smoke weed and listen to Led Zeppelin (sorry, mom). I actually think the new season is very weak so far, but there’s still an air of authenticity to the proceedings that is rarely matched by other reality shows. “Project Runway” and “America’s Next Top Model” being the other two. I know, I know…I’m a little girl eating frosted flakes with her teddy bear. Whatever.

My horse so far is the 16 year-old chick with the Raggedy Anne hair. The girl can wail. Don’t go getting sloppy, now, Annie!

Survivor: Tocantin. Okay, I’m not the biggest fan of this show and haven’t watched it since the first one. To be honest, I’m not sure why I’m watching it now. It was on when nothing else was, I guess, and it’s kind of fun to watch everyone get skinny and look better half-naked than they ever will again. Oh, and this is official: implants will outlive you. That’s all I’m saying.

Dr. Drew Pinsky: Rich, tired of the lies.

The other distractions that I like––Rock of Love Whore Bus, Celebrity Rehab: Sober, My Ass, and the American incarnation of one I used to love from the U.K. called “Ladette to Lady” which is now known as The Cum Dumpsters of Hedsor Hall or something, are in alternating degrees of hiatus and hilarious. Seriously, what is the logic behind a sober house? You get a bunch of ex-junkies together, put another ex-junkie in charge of them, allow them to come and go as they please, and watch one by one as each completely fucks up whatever ground they gained in rehab. It makes for great TV, but how far are we from “Celebrity Suicide House” or “Baby Daddy Stud Farm School for Wayward Video Ho’s”? The last time they scraped anything off the bottom of barrel and made it into something truly worthwhile it was called Grappa. And to be honest, it sucks, too.

Of course, I also consume it. Pay lots of money for the honor, to boot. But hey, I work hard and do lots of thinking at the same time. Why not come at the world in a completely stupid way every once and awhile to recharge. It’s MSNBC, Sports, and trash TV until my eyes bleed, so suck ‘em. At least I’m being honest.

That said, I’d like to leave you with a little video that is both cool, and something of a confession. Even though I liked it overall, I was a little hard on “True Blood” back when it was on, and now I have to admit I’ve started to miss it. Ain’t that always the way? You narrow-ass Gothic cowboys is always so stooopid!

Anyway, attached, please find the very cool opening title sequence accompanied by the even cooler theme song called “Bad Things” sung by up-and-coming patty flipper, Jace Everett. And until sometime next week, probably Friday, have a great weekend. Oh, and if anyone’s watching “Doll House”, let me know how it is, would you? I’m a fan of both Whedon and Dushku, but I’ve not been impressed enough by the commercials to sacrifice my Friday night. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, see the entry below this one. Heh.

Congrats, Mickey — R.I.P Loki

Yes, yes…it’s one of those entries. A typical, end of the year, nostalgically self-absorbed menu of rehash and hodgepodge that seeks to define one’s future by exploring one’s immediate past under the pretense that we have any control over either. And I might as well tell you the end: I’ll find it in me, after much hedging and hand-wringing, to conclude that the trailing twelve months have been learning experiences and that, if I take each painful second to task, 2009 will be, at most, 51% positive. And then I’ll sign off with something wistful, lacing my words with the appropriate mixture of determinism and melancholy so that my caricature here remains slightly tragic, yet ever-so courageous.

Oh, fuck that. To be honest, it’s been a decent year of love, work and wonder and any disappointments seemed to fuel new adventures and fresh outlooks on what’s important and what’s not, what’s going well and what might need a tweak here or there. I tend to enjoy the turning of the new year in all of its predictably garish glory that sets awash over the human genome like so much spilled glitter on a bared, rosy tit. It’s a fist in the air, a solo out; none of it should count for the rest of it but some of it should count for something. Or something.

In any event, I’ll be spending it with a loved one and a few other loved ones and maybe having some exotically flavored dip. I could be persuaded to indulge in a cocktail or two, and if I’m feeling nasty, a bit of Wii bowling. If all goes as planned, I’ll miss the ball dropping due to watching the 8-ball drop into the side pocket, and when informed of the clock’s final tick and rewind, I’ll shake a few hands and plant a doozy on my Weezy. Then I’ll go back to doing what I was doing and considering more dip. And beer. And maybe a shot of mighty fine whisky.

Okay, so maybe a small list is in order: I wrote two books, read a few more, learned a lot, spent time with friends I hadn’t seen in a while, saw some gorgeous English countryside, watched a few horror classics and a couple of newer, non-classics, discovered Alien Worlds and other audio book magic, changed my sideburns, bought some awesome dresses that look fantastic on my woman, cured my cat of diabetes (sort of!), and got hardwood floors. On the negative side, I watched my favorite sports team play like poo with feet and my other favorite sports team win the world series. Wait, this is supposed to be all negative. Okay, let me try again…the economy blows, but Obama won the election. Sorry, one more time…we lost some real talent in the entertainment industry and a lot of good men and women died in a pointless war, but my family is healthy and I’ve got loads of great friends.

Shit, maybe I just can’t do full-bore negative. Let’s call it a character flaw and move on.

In the end, and more germane to this blog, I wrote a lot and did it listening to lots of good music and drinking a fair amount of good beer. I imagine I’ll do much of the same in the coming year, and it is my new goal to achieve the old goal that I failed to achieve in 2008: secure literary representation. Whether I accomplish that or not, I will have written hundreds of thousands of more words, each one in its place, doing work, baring my soul by some equation, and giving me countless hours of satisfaction and joy. In between, I will live my life much as I have done up to this point. The future is hopeful, good people. Keep your eyes open and your ears to the ground and with a little luck we’ll see one another on the other side with smiles, and stories and song. And whisky.

Before I sign off, please click the eye above and give some love to a woman who puts together a blog that is tireless in its offerings of the beautiful, haunting, frightening and purely unusual. Please? Cheers.

Have a wonderful new year, everyone. See you.

Lately I’ve been indulging in all forms of radio dramas, and I have to confess, I’m addicted. As far as I’m concerned, Book Radio is the best thing to come out of the Sirius/XM radio merge. In fact, I barely listen to music or regular old talk radio in my travels anymore. How could I when I’ve got an endless supply of well produced audio literature to enjoy? For instance, this is what I listened to yesterday:

Harry Nile (6:30 am – 7:00 am) – he’s an old skool gumshoe who always gets his man but never the dame. Tightly produced, with the added benefit of a few unintentional chuckles.

SONIC TALK: Slice of Sci-Fi (7:00 am – 7:30 am) – what it says on the tin. A couple of broadcasters talk about science fiction movies, books and TV. Sonic Talk on other days will interview authors about their books and they really dig-in with discussion of perspective, plot, character, you name it. It’s like taking a masters class on the way into work.

Work.

Orson Scott Card’s Universe – Shadow of the Hegemon (10:00am – 10:30 am) – there are occasions where I’ll be on the road at this time, and while I’ve seen this guy’s stuff on the shelves, I’ve never tried it out. I may be changing my mind. The writing is excellent and so are the productions. The most ingeniously sci-fi thing about the show is how quickly it makes time fly.

And then they run some productions that are repeated on my way home. Depending on when I leave, I’ve been listening to:

The Big Read presents The Age of Innocence by Edith Wharton (4:30pm – 5:00pm) – this chick could write, flat out. Again, it’s something I’d probably never pick up, which is exactly why it’s thrilling now and why my writing will likely benefit as a result.

Alien Worlds by Arthur C. Clarke (5:00pm – 5:30pm) – this production is without a doubt my favorite. Jon Graydon and Buddy Griff (can you get more 50′s than that?) are space captains who, along with Dr. Maura Cassidy encounter all manner of “aliens”, which is a concept I find kind of funny considering that everyone in space is pretty much on equal footing, aren’t they? Well, this crew doesn’t think so. As far as I can tell, they consider space their personal domain (post-WWII politics are a gas), and anyone they encounter is an alien out to destroy them. Check out this summary from a recent, and mostly hilarious episode called “The Sun Stealers”:

Captains Jon Graydon and Buddy Griff, Dr. Maura Cassidy and the intrepid crew of Starlab meet Zarr Khonar, leader of the monster aliens from the Marcab Confederacy. Will Earth freeze over and become a solid mass of ice as the Marcab mine our sun’s energy? Find out as we cross the threshold of the unknown and enter…

…ALIEN WORLDS. The announcer is classic “suit and tie with slicked back hair” and sometimes, half the fun is doing your own running commentary a la Mystery Science Theater. But not always. I’ve just listened to part three of “The ISA Conspiracy”, and it was actually pretty scary. Sure, they have to slather the voices with all sorts of outdated audio tricks (I’m pretty sure Khonar was done by talking into a fan), but you can’t beat the sound effects and sharp direction. Last up, is…

Classic Naxos Audiobooks presents The Woman in White by Wilkie Collins (5:30pm – 6:00) – Wilkie can flat out write, as well. It’s rolling, complex stuff that makes you want to slap the reader sometimes and yell, “out with it, fool!”, but once you get into the groove, you’re lost in the spooky tale of a man who is trying to save the woman he loves but keeps running into a mysterious woman he’s seen dressed head-to-toe in white. At one point in the story he’s heard describing another woman sat at a table who was the laziest person he’d ever seen, and figured God must have created her at the same time he created the cabbage. It had me laughing out loud.

Anyway, that’s what I listen to and from work, and when I’m out running errands, or heading to get something to eat at the weekend, or whenever I’m in the car. There are also live theater reads that I’ve thoroughly enjoyed, including an LA Theater Works production of Arthur Miller’s The Ride Down Mt. Morgan that was pure class. I’ve also run into a bunch horror sites online such as Darker Projects and a few others, so I’ll give them a few more listens and report my findings when I think I’ve got a handle on which ones are quality, and which ones are not yet up to snuff. If anyone knows of anything out there that I might like, I’m definitely down to hear about it.

As I’ve said in the past, I’m planning on reading some of my own work that you’ll be able to download from this site, and while I work up something new, I may decide to read something from previous titles. I’ve got a trove of screenplays that might suit the format down to the ground, although I’d have to play all the parts and my production values may have to be kind of arty minimalist. It’s not always necessary to imitate, and there are ways around sound effects, but we’ll see how that goes. I can read prose and poetry, as well, which require very little outside of a narrator.

Until then, check out some of those links. I think you’ll dig it. And if you’re a young lady, look out: Buddy likes the ladies.